Alcohol was the scaffolding I used to support my transition into manhood. It helped me to deal with the frightening reality of the world and my changing place within it. … As fun as the good times were, I wish I could’ve found another way.
Learning to move into our own masculinity, and the femininity that’s a part of it, is something that’s worth doing for others, in order to relax, to find what our bodies want to do, free from social preconceptions.
When your partner’s the same gender as you, one thing you’re gifted is a blank slate. Cleaning the gutters, ironing, taking the car for a service, buying sheets—it’s all up for grabs. And that’s what Alex sees.
There were no easy answers, he was saying, which is the same as saying there are no answers at all. And even though I wasn’t asking him, the answer I got was to empathise with the bullies. Forgive them all, they know not what they do.
He didn’t have to do anything that day in Chile, but my uncle took time out of his life to take care of me. A child is raised by the community, and a boy learns to be a man from the men around him.
I realise now that it would’ve been better for us both if I had stayed away sooner. But it was hard for me to let go of you because you were my father and I loved you.
It’s an odd thing to look at someone you’ve shared your life with and wonder if they’re about to kill you.